YOU CAN'T UNRING A BELL

Originally published 11/24/2011

While I was searching for vintage Christmas cards on a site I belong to, this bizarro image showed up.  The image is from Jeff Welch,  blogger and Bus Operator from the Peugeot Sound area.  Never met him.  He's one of several  followers of Al Margulies' Rantings Blog. In the past he's also referred to me a "bitch, pathetic, lesbian, psychotic and a 'him.'"  

A couple of years ago I started this blog because as a victim of Cyber abuse I realized that without it I would remain a victim.  I didn't have a VOICE until I created one and exposed my abuser.  My abuser started using a tape recording he made and published of me (without my knowledge or consent) on his blog and continued to use it as a means to control me.  I then started educating myself about the similarities between Domestic and Cyber abuse. 

Article after article stated the most common similarities between Domestic and Cyber Abuse as:  (what pertained to me, specifically)

1.) Control over the victim when the victim leaves the relationship or friendship.

2.) When the victim exposes their abuser, the abuser starts damaging the victims reputation (personally and professionally) so they wouldn't be believed.

The National Center for Victims of Crime

"THE PRACTICE OF CYBER BULLYING IS NOT LIMITED TO CHILDREN AND, WHILE THE BEHAVIOR IS IDENTIFIED BY THE SAME DEFINITION AS ADULTS, THE DISTINCTION IN AGE GROUPS IS REFERRED TO AS CYBERSTALKING OR CYBER HARASSMENT WHEN PERPETRATED BY ADULTS TOWARDS ADULTS. COMMON TACTICS USED BY CYBER STALKERS CARE TO VANDALIZE A SEARCH ENGINE OR ENCYCLOPEDIA, TO THREATEN A VICTIM'S EARNINGS, EMPLOYMENT, REPUTATION, OR SAFETY.

A PATTERN OF REPEATED SUCH ACTIONS AGAINST A TARGET BY AND BETWEEN ADULTS CONSTITUTES CYBERSTALKING."

For me, the Cyber Abuse expanded into other forms of abuse which gradually grew into a life of it's own as it moved from the internet into my workplace (bullpen, transit centers and bus) a threat to my job, my Union benefits and representation, Community and my home.

It started online through Margulies' Rantings' Blog where he secretly recorded and published a private conversation between he and I.

He then used the recording to control me publicly.  Mostly during those times when I refused to continue a friendship that had been betrayed and during those times when he tried to control my behavior such as signing a petition to have a Union Officer recalled for theft.

It attracted the attention of other bloggers, such as Jeff Welch from the screen shot above as well as  Punkwracker4783 and Christopher Day.

It then became an intolerable and hostile work environment as Trimet refused to enforce their own IT/Respectful Workplace policies for me.

It moved into my bus through the recognition of pictures (old and new) which Margulies maintains on another blog which then manifested into threatening glares and negativity of customers.

It moved into the stores I shop at through recognition and hostility.

It moved into the halls of my Union through their attempts to get me blackballed.

My employment, Union benefits and representation were under attack.

My safety was at issue.

My situation was textbook until it took a turn and the abuse physically entered my workplace which included the bullpen/s, Transit Centers, the offices of Trimet Human Resources and the sanctity of the Bus I operate for Trimet.  It attacked how I and others interact with each other.

...and then I was able to prove the Blackballing efforts were scams.

...and I was able to prove that even the Union Representative from Merlo was under their spell.

...and as time moved so did my journey.  This blog, THE CAUSE AND EFFECT OF CYBER BULLY/STALKERS is a documentation depicting my journey of victimization not only through stalker Margulies but his followers - the haters - the enablers - and ones who pretend loyalties to him in spite of what they know.

...as time moved, those of us who shared similar experiences through this blog saw underneath my ramblings of the obvious, the daily or monthly postings I've written for the last couple of years about what the haters were up to, what they've done to me and others and it started to speak LOUDER and CLEARER.  And this blog then became about pain, education and solution.. What I've found is that abuse happens but the ones who are gonna be there to help you through it are the ones who've also been abused.  The 'others' don't get it.  "Why don't you just walk away?"

If you see someone that was hit by a car laying in the middle of the street, bleeding - you don't walk away.

By the same token, If you see someone in your workplace that's the obvious victim of domestic or cyber abuse - you don't just walk away.

Cyber abuse, domestic abuse, child abuse, animal abuse, abuse to the Planet, regardless of the form or to whom or what the fact that the human spirit is so very capable of destroying that which they don't understand is beyond comprehension.

Those that follow enable.

Those that enable protect

Those that protect destroy

Those that destroy abuse.

And so my journey today takes me on a path of clarity and vision to seek out those within the criminal justice system who will deal with the abuse.